I Hope Jack Bauer Doesn't Blow Up the Internet

I wish exciting things happened to me. The most exciting thing that's happened to me is being anxious that I didn't make enough snacks for Cookie, Coffee, and Conversation time after church this past Sunday. Weren't we all relieved to find out I did. Make enough. Snacks.

Or the time Oprah came to town and stayed on the street I live on and how I couldn't drive and all the people driving by kept asking me (because I had to walk since cars kept blocking the street in front of the residence where Oprah stayed) if "SHE" was still here.

I think I always wanted to live a Jack Bauer life, but without the terrorists, nuclear explosions or Kim Raver.

For some reason, I've always wanted to have powers of some sort. When I was little, I thought I was a vampire. I have two pointy teeth at just the right points for those nifty vampire bites. I can say, "I want to bite your neck and suck your blood" in a better vampire voice than Bela Lugosi. My eyes hurt when I come in contact with direct sunlight... I mean, what else would you assume?

Of course, I turned 7 and I realized that it was possible vampires didn't exist. I mean, I wasn't fighting them off or anything, so I went on with my existence of hoping to become Bo Duke (I hadn't figured out I was supposed to be attracted to him yet) but my brothers and cousins kept making me be Daisy and I didn't want to play no girl! I wanted to be Bo. Not Luke, Bo!

I was kind of obstinate.

When I got a little older, I realized that I could play the girl parts in our games of fantasy. I wanted to be Wonder Woman or Storm although it was still well within my rights to be Spider Man or (with a good enough fight) Batman. If I couldn't have an actual science experiment gone wrong super power, then I wanted to at least be as inventive as Batman.

Of course, when we were kids, we wanted our powers for such lofty goals as saving the world. Today, I would settle for being able to ram into the car that just cut me off without getting hurt or set things on fire with my mind (a la Stephen King's Firestarter) when I get angry. My ideals are not gone, just on hiatus as I deal with everyday life.

Maybe that's why I like fantasy and sci-fi shows. I like seeing the difference between the youthful exuberance of getting abilities and realizing you could save the entire world (Hiro on Heroes) and the kind of hard bitten edge that you get when you realize people aren't as good as you wish they were (Adam Monroe on Heroes). I like remembering that within myself and I like how, every now and then, I still wish I could save the world.

So, I might not have that magical, save the world 3 times in one day, kind of Jack Bauer life, but I think that for me, as Farmer Hoggett says, "that'll do, pig. That'll do." (This really plays more into my fascination with pigs and especially talking pig movies, but that's a later post.)

edit: I couldn't let this pass. Thanks to speakeasyx for the link.


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